Simon Lincoln Reader
A new centrist bloc is reportedly being formed between South African opposition parties − namely Musi Maimane’s BOSA, Songezo Zibi’s Rise Mzansi and Patricia de Lille’s GOOD. ActionSA was also said to be willing, until it withdrew − a practice the party has some form with.
This is a sound idea. Centrism is a wonderful position − the idea that you can poach the best of the left or the right and discard the excess. Some of centrism’s foundations are universally appealing, including but not limited to common sense, the rule of law and of course, two ideas existing simultaneously.
A theoretically centrist view is that there are only two sexes. Though there are…
Audience Engagement: Newspapers are increasingly focusing on audience
engagement strategies to retain readers and attract new ones.
Baby Brown
Interview with a pirate:
There was a pirate who had agreed to do an interview with a local tv station. The reporter was very courteous and professional, giving a bit of background as to the pirate\’s business. She then began interviewing him.
\”So Mr. Longbeard, are there any risks to your business? I see you have a peg leg- how did that come about?\”
\”Well, y\’see I were sailing along the coast of South Africa, looking to plunder some locals when as I boarded the small boat from the ship, a great white shark came up and got my leg clean off. \’twas scary yes, but thus is the life of a pirate.\”
\”Wow, that is pretty scary- well, how about your hook? What happened to your hand with that?\”
\”Oh now that\’s quite the tale, y\’see I were fighting a rival pirate, and we had locked swords. We had been fighting for a few hours, and were both terribly fatigued. I had a bit of exhaustion and confusion, and when I went to block one of his sword blows, I met him with me hand instead of me sword. Took it right off, but it shocked him so much I managed to get him back pretty good and have him submit. So the hook hand was given as a replacement.\”
\”Wow. Simply fascinating. Now, what about your eye patch? How did that happen?\”
\”Well, one day, a seagull was flying overhead, and I looked up. It pooped right in me eye.\”
\”… Well wow. I must admit, I wouldn\’t think just seagull poop could damage the eye that badly.\”
\”Oh, I forgot to mention… it were me first day with the hook.\”
Noh Noh
Shongololo – millipede [sh-ong-o-loh-loh] A term used to describe a large brown millipede. It is derived from the isiZulu word ‘ukushonga’, meaning to roll up.